If you suffer from OCD-like, repetitive jealous thoughts about your partner’s past, there are several forms of retroactive jealousy treatment you can try.
Firstly, let’s take a look at just what is retroactive jealousy?
What are the different ways it manifests itself? And what are the different forms of retroactive jealousy treatment you can apply to each?
What Is Retroactive Jealousy?
Retroactive jealousy is a condition in which the sufferer becomes angry, upset, mistrustful, jealous, judgmental, and fearful of a partner’s past.
This jealousy usually falls into one of two camps:
- Retroactive jealousy over a husband/wife, boy/girlfriend’s sexual past.
- Retroactive jealousy over a husband/wife, boy/girlfriend’s romantic past.
In general, men tend to fall more into the first camp, and women into the second. But there are no hard and fast rules about this.
(Here’s a look at what causes retroactive jealousy and why it affects men and women differently.)
Retroactive jealousy in men is often characterized as a Madonna-whore complex, meaning he has divided women up into saints and sinners.
Whether you suffer from retroactive jealousy over a partner’s sexual past or over their former relationships, the symptoms are usually the same:
- Repetitive thoughts and “mini-movies” about a partner being with someone from the past.
- Feelings of judgment about a partner’s past.
- Feelings of anxiety.
- A desire to find out as much as possible about a partner’s past.
- Arguments with said partner about their past.
So, how to do you overcome retroactive jealousy?
There Are 3 Main Types Of Retroactive Jealousy Treatment You Can Try
1. Retroactive Jealousy Therapy
This form of retroactive jealousy treatment isn’t something I advise.
Overall, it’s confusing and time-consuming trying to decide which form of therapy to take. It’s expensive. And your therapist has probably not suffered from retroactive jealousy themselves.
In my opinion it’s doubtful whether talking about your childhood as most traditional therapy dictates will be of much help.
(You can read about this in more detail here: Should You Pay For Retroactive Jealousy Therapy?)
2. Retroactive Jealousy Self-Treatment
You could always go it alone and try and beat retroactive jealousy by yourself.
Many sufferers think overcoming retroactive jealousy can be achieved by reading about it, thinking about it and talking to their partner about it.
As you may have realized, though, this rarely works.
Others search out prescription drugs to help ease their anxiety but, again, I feel this is unnecessary.
It’s kind of a slippery slope once you start taking drugs and I wouldn’t recommend it when there are other drug-free options out there.
3. Retroactive Jealousy Course
I have a course entitled “Overcoming Retroactive Jealousy 101” that’s been proven to cure retroactive jealousy for good.
I also have a book “The Ultimate Retroactive Jealousy Cure: How To Stop Being Jealous Of Your Partner’s Past in 12 Steps” that can help.
Rather than spend a small fortune on retroactive jealousy therapy, or spend another six months in agony trying to work out how to stop being jealous, either of these will show you what to do.
Step-by-step, these products will take you from the judgmental, anxiety-ridden you to a happier you, free from retroactive jealousy.
Check out some customer testimonials here.
Or drop me a line if you want to chat.
Onward!
Jeff
I’ve suffered anxiety attacks my whole life. This is different anxiety attacks now because I’m afraid I will never be able to look at my wife or be intimate with her without thinking someone else has been her and done this. Pictures play over continuously and I then have a panic attack thinking they will never stop.. just read another book on this and I honestly didn’t think it was something that was going to help me and really discouraged me when he said it took him 2 years to get over it. I totally know it’s not an over night thing. Just like to get some feedback insight on the book and overview.
I’ve suffered anxiety attacks my whole life. This is different anxiety attacks now because I’m afraid I will never be able to look at my wife or be intimate with her without thinking someone else has been her and done this. Pictures play over continuously and I then have a panic attack thinking they will never stop.. just read another book on this and I honestly didn’t think it was something that was going to help me and really discouraged me when he said it took him 2 years to get over it. I totally know it’s not an over night thing. Just like to get some feedback insight on the book and overview.
Please don’t post this its in the wrong spot
Jeff, I am a 20 year old college kid who has been friends with this girl since the start of the school year (about 10 months ago) I have always had a crush on this girl but never actually pursued anything with her, instead slept around with other girls. My roommate and one of my best friends at the time was hooking up with her behind my back (about 7-8) months ago. This girl and I started catching real feelings for each other about 3-4 months ago and we fell in love and have been dating ever since. Everything is perfect, but the thought of her hooking up with my roommate has haunted me since the day I have met her. I have expressed my feeling to both her and my roomate multiple times and they always explain how much they love and care about me and regret it a lot. I can’t help but feel anxious and shitty all the time. And it is the worst because I know I am being dumb and just want it to stop. But I cant. I need help. Any advise would mean the world to me.