Getting over retroactive jealousy can be an all-consuming occupation. I hear from both men and women all the time who say that their boy or girlfriend’s past is the first thing they think about when they wake up, and the last thing they think about before they go to sleep.
All day, in effect, is spent coping with retroactive jealousy about the past rather than living life in the present.
This is no way to live. And so if you’re having trouble dealing with retroactive jealousy in this way, here’s something you need to always keep in mind.
Getting Over Retroactive Jealousy — A Simple Mind Hack
We tend to suffer from all kinds of problems, but they can roughly be divided into two separate camps:
- Real problems
- False problems
Real problems are obviously things like being deep in debt, watching a loved-one slowly die, coping with life in a wheelchair, etc. These are real problems that many of us have to deal with on a daily basis.
There are also real problems that affect us in the moment — for example, being attacked by someone, sitting on a plane that might crash, or being chased by a bear while out hiking, etc.
Whether they’re real problems about an over-arching “life issue” or a life threatening event in the moment, the fact is they’re of serious concern to our well-being.
False problems, on the other hand, are not. These kind of problems include being afraid of giving a speech, talking to an attractive stranger in a bar, or regretting something you did three years ago.
These false problems are generated by the mind and are therefore not really problems at all. Our minds have created them.
Retroactive jealousy ocd and being imprisoned in a constant state of anxiety about our boy or girlfriend’s past romantic or sex life is, of course, a false problem.
Getting Over Retroactive Jealousy Becomes Easier If You Always Remember It’s A False Problem
It’s all too easy to continue going about your day letting retrospective jealousy consume you. But if you remember that it’s a false problem generated by your mind, then you’ll be able to put some distance between yourself and your anxiety.
Whenever you feel yourself becoming overwhelmed by jealous thoughts, take a step back and tell yourself “This is a false problem. This is not something that can really hurt me. It’s just something that’s been created by mind.”
Doing this will make getting over retroactive jealousy that much easier. If you need help getting over retroactive jealousy and actually beating it, check out my course “Overcoming Retroactive Jealousy 101”.
It offers the most comprehensive step-by-step plan you can find anywhere online to getting over retroactive jealousy and finally eradicating it once and for all.
